Bagel Flash - Could it be true or is it just journo…
…Babel.
A single source is reporting that we’re on the verge of signing Ajax ace Ryan Babel. The 20 year old can play as both a striker and a left winger since he’s bloody quick and can shoot with both feet. Don’t believe me? Take a look at this…
His goal record wasn’t fantastic last season with 18 appearences and just 2 to his name but then on how many of those occasions was he playing on the flank? I don’t know. You’ll have to ask him. Slightly better though is his national record with 3 in 11 but I think we’ll all agree that he certainly looks like he can play.
He’s 6′1″ and tonnes of fun and dressed to a ‘t’. Oh no, that’s Big Bank Hank from the Sugarhill Gang. The young Dutchman is indeed of the same height but The Bagel couldn’t really comment on the player’s charisma or fashion sense…or could I? Here’s his head…
…looks to me he’s not buying his own clothes. Reports are he’s bought a gun for the next person who uses the phrase, ‘You’ll grow into it.’
The scum we’re said to be big fans of Ryan’s but it just may be that we’ve convinced him. After all Edgar and MJ are going to know exactly how this kid likes his pancakes; heavy on the mayo.
Could it be true? I don’t know. With a story reported from a minor source as inside information, it’s always hard to tell but I wanted to bring a little light to the day before I lay down yesterday’s match report. If it’s even half as cathartic to read as it is to right, then don’t you dare miss out.
Phone a friend today. Let it all out.
The Tower of Bagel.
The Bagel.
January 15th, 2007 at 3:50 pm
Watch out for Stuart Pearce - he’s reportedly just given up on SWP (like he would have EVER got him on loan), so will be most likely well up for a bit of babel-fishing…
January 15th, 2007 at 4:24 pm
oooh - striker AND a left winger in one… interesting.
Is anyone going to get SWP?
in other unconfirmed rumours, Mourinho may yet have money to splash on a striker - I still think that Defoe may go
Ryan Babel - Rhymes with Beef Bagel.
*gets coat*
January 15th, 2007 at 5:20 pm
>> Is anyone going to get SWP?
My guess would be only if Chelsea accept that they’ll lose money on the deal…
January 15th, 2007 at 9:31 pm
I think they’re ready to lose some of that £21m but probably no more than 5 or 6 of it.
Shaun Philips is proving tougher to break free than Mandela.
The Bagel.
January 17th, 2007 at 12:02 am
I would really like to see the left wing conumdrum solved, though I doubt Spurs will cough up enough bangers for the boy Babel. Hoever, we can always use the age old, tried & tested tactic of attracting good players on the ethos & history of the club as well!
By the way, my big bruv, Yid of the West was at last Sunday’s game against Newcastle, the sporny geordies deserved nothing from a game where we created so many chances but once again were found lacking on the finishing ball, they ended up arsehole lucky, a point taken to the small town in Scotland would have been too generous
January 17th, 2007 at 3:02 am
Just been writing a report on the game I was hoping would make me feel better. Instead I have spent the last few hours reliving the nightmare and I’m back to chewing the furniture. The Yid of the West (not the wicked one I trust) was dead on. 24 shots we had to their 4. Robbed.
Hmm…yes, ethos and history…how about a promise that Edgar Davids wont go round and look up his family?
The Bagel.