The players in Spain staying mainly off the plane (to the Lane)
I really not feeling very funny today. I managed to catch the last 10 minutes of the Champions League game last night - commiserations ‘pudlians - and ended up helping a Scouse friend drown his sorrows in his London hotel room along with five others, and lots of beer, and some champagne, and a porn channel that was still on this morning when I woke up with my lips glued together and not a drop of water in sight.
An assortment of beer cans in a variety of states from empty to full littered the room with cigarette butts next to the “No Smoking” sign on the table. John, the Scouser and official tenant of the room down for a business conference, worked his way about the evidence; a detective trying to piece his forgotten night together. He learnt the hard way at every turn, stepping on broken glass from the tumbler smashed when one of our number disappeared into the night never to be seen again, scrabbling at the toilet door before seeing the broken, bent brass lump on the floor which he himself had fallen on from the top of the table.
The TV stand was buckled, the smoke alarm covered in a shower cap and the room stunk of nicotine. I slept fully clothed which was a freshing changing having spent much of the evening in my boxer shorts. Fortunately my jeans managed to lose the crease I’d put down the front of them with the wall-mounted Corby trouser press.
No toothpaste, no breakfast, I’ve stumbled into work on the crutch of a can of coke and I’m doing my best no to breathe on anyone and generally keep my greasy haired head down.
After that interlude I can only bring you a few footballing matters but I do love to talk tales of destruction. Yes, the Samuel Eto’o story from yesterday was most interesting. Unfortunately, it’s form the same speculative stables as the rumours about Ronaldinho’s agent playing golf with a bloke who cleans out the chicken soup machine in the service station where Daniel Levy’s secretary fills up her car that says that we’re in advanced talks with the Brazilian but his £140k a week wage demands are proving a wee bit of a stumbling block.
I don’t suppose it’s out of the question we could end up with two Barca stars but I’d be more than a little shocked if we signed either.
Cata Diaz’s move from the Iberian peninsula is looking a little more unlikely today after Getafe chairman Angel Torres (good name) talked about how much he admires the player and exactly what lengths he went to to sign the defender from Boca Juniors in the first place.
“I have always liked that kind of strong defender,” said Torres. “A number of teams are following him but he signed with us after I called him in the afternoons after every training session.”
I wouldn’t hold out too much hope for our £4m bid after Getafe rejected one for £6.4 from Juve but we could always match the value for his buy-out clause. It’s only £12m.
Yet another Spanish transfer looks to have bitten the dust after Louis Fabiano has announced that he wants to stay in Sevilla. There’s some rather complicated politics whereby the club want him to stay but their financial backers want him to go to make as much as they can for the striker while he’s in his 29-year-old prime. Not really too fussed here personally. He looks like a bit of a loose cannon as it is.
Darren Bent will feel like it’s Christmas and his birthday rolled into one next season if we don’t find a grade A replacement for Dimitar the Great. Apparently, he’s keen to stay and, in a plea for more games from Juande, said:
“If you play a number of games consecutively, any striker will score goals,” which isn’t the greatest self-sell I’ve ever read.
It reads a little like he’s saying that he’s only as good as any old striker, and as it goes he might be right.
Ok. Enough of this. I’m barely making sense in my own head today. Hope for feeling a little more together than The Bagel today. I’m looking forward to some promised pampering over at LB’s tonight and an episode of the Apprentice - best thing on TV, until tomorrow night that is.
Save the bagel, save the world.
The Bagel.
April 23rd, 2008 at 4:11 pm
Bagel, a lucozade and a doze usually does the trick for me, but its not always easy to explain why you’ve been under you desk for an hour. Aside from trying not to exhail, I also try to avoid the gaze of my co-workers when my eyes look like a pair of peeled dog’s bollocks.
By now, this season is rather like a hangover that won’t go away as well. Maybe there will be a last highpoint with victory over Liverpool on the last day? Odds are that Riise might help with that!
Selling Berbatov and promoting Bent without getting a replacement would be a blunder. I am really trying to see some truth in the Eto’o rumor. That would a coup…but would it leave any money to sure up the back and get a midfielder who can pass to him?? As you have said yourself “one player, does not make a team”….
April 23rd, 2008 at 5:41 pm
I love the different ‘mini cultures’ between blogs. On this one word has it we’re in for Eto’o. On Harry Hotspur there are strong rumours around Ronaldinho, amongst others. Purely by the law of averages one of em’s gotta be true
April 24th, 2008 at 9:59 am
Anyone actually think we’ll WIN Sat??
April 24th, 2008 at 11:33 am
Win? What’s that?
April 24th, 2008 at 11:36 am
1992Yido
My heart (loyal as ever) is telling me we’ll win, but on the performances of late, my mind is saying another strong start, keeping the ball well, good breaks,a goal… That’s the first half done & dusted, followed by a second half where we relax, let them back in the game, they draw even & we end the game with a nervous draw & 1 point
But my heart still keeps the faith
COYS
April 24th, 2008 at 2:36 pm
This is the funniest thing
http://sport.setanta.com/en/Sport/News/Football/2008/04/24/Prem-Bilic-on-Modric/
April 24th, 2008 at 2:47 pm
Somethings must have got lost in translation. Bilic surely cannot be that much of a fuckwit!
April 24th, 2008 at 2:47 pm
Top 5 eh? Nice!
Nonsense but nice!
April 24th, 2008 at 4:02 pm
Do Chelsea count in the top 5 ?
Surely all current results must be marked with an asterisk*
In fact who are the top 5 ?
Obviously ManUre and our lot then Scouse cunts - who after that ?
*Abramovich Inspired Results
April 24th, 2008 at 4:30 pm
Do you mean the “Big 5″
Well, it used to be the 2 North London clubs, the 2 scouse clubs and United.
As for Chelsea?
old 2nd Division in my book.
They are only a recent top flight aberration. We all know where they really belong.
April 24th, 2008 at 4:41 pm
You have to base it on: titles, crowd draw, and history, as well as financial position. There’s no question Spurs are a bigger club than Chelski.
April 24th, 2008 at 5:05 pm
Not sure they are with regards to titles ? Certainly they have won more leagues than spuds.
They also draw a bigger crowd dont they ?
Financial position would also put them in a better position than you, just from their showing in the CL.
April 24th, 2008 at 5:26 pm
They’ve won one more league title than tottenham, but half as many FA cups, and have spent more time out of the top flight than spurs.
Regarding history, where were they in the 1980s? I think Ken Bates ended up buying them for a quid.
April 24th, 2008 at 7:46 pm
That article is right, the bar codes are more likely to be english champions than we are, its just that they are more likely to be champions one division down.