Beef Bagel

Now, I would add my comments to the end of the last post but seeing as I was about to write this one, I didn’t want the conversation to be lost forever. I had a little read of that Joe Lewis article as well. Thankfully, it’s not as much as an issue as Ki Ki would like us to believe and of course being a banker up in his 11th Floor investment tower, I’m sure he knows that.

Bear Stearns, which sounds more like the droppings of a large North American mammal than a bank, and it’s crash probably has greater ramifications to the world economy as a whole than it does to the pockets of Joe Lewis or, more importantly, Tottenham Hotspurs. Thankfully our club works independently of The Billionaire Bomber’s cash and would only have to be sold if he found himself on the street and according to a club spokesman:

“He’s probably still sitting on the best part of £2 billion worth of assets.”

Probably not going to be found frozen to his armchair on 10th January with his gas cut off. The other reliable thing about being a multi-billionaire is that it probably wasn’t luck that got him there in the first place. You don’t get rich by being crap with money and as I’ve heard over quoted several thousand times, it’s easier to turn £1m into £2m than it is to make £1 into £2.

However, were we a club in debt, it may be time to don the brown trousers. With a credit crunch on the way, any club with a brand new, big stadium may find the rates on their loan jacked up to astronomical, unaffordable levels and then assets really would have to be flogged like the Leeds United garage sale of the late 90s.

But before you get too excited, no this does not include arsenal. Our neighbours were shrewd enough to get a good deal on their £300m + with a fixed rate of interest over the next 25 years, which should see them through any recession and beyond through another few cycles of boom and bust. According to the Telegraph, though, clubs like Man U and Liverpool have far shorter deals and any of you with fixed rate mortgages of your own out there will know that you often get five or so years of low rate bliss at the price of being tied into the deal for an extra two years of whatever rate your lender wishes to charge. We could be hearing another charity single from Merseyside in a few years to come.

Of course, these clubs could follow our lead in this time of crisis and launch a shit load of merchandise. Anyone else receive their summer collection catalogue yesterday morning? Something for everyone in there. I particularly like the car mats and luggage tags. I’m surprised to see they overlooked the opportunity to brand dentures and belly-button fluff. On a marginally more serious note, I am very tempted by the 3/4 length navy “training pant“, which is exactly what I’d be doing in them if I tried to run. They look good on Little Aaron as he struts about at half time. Come to think of it, they’re probably just shorts on him. Also I’m not too sure if I should be taking fashion tips from the lightening dwarf. There’s a fine line between stylish and twat and I’ve a feeling shaving a couple of go-faster-stripes in my eyebrows would push me just the wrong side of the divide.

Away from myself, there’s some indoctrination to be done with my sister, the Croissant, due a Yidlet of her own come the end of June. Looking forward to the little lad/lass’ first trip with Uncle Bagel down the Lane and there’s a couple of baby grows, bibs and dummies on the list. Naturally, LB won’t be spared either with a saucier little Hotspur garter in The Bagel’s sites as well, classy guy that I am. She should count herself lucky there’s no peep-hole bras.

But enough of the trinkets and finances; Sunday. Yep, we was robbed out of a technical victory but I don’t think the scoreline was grossly unfair. I’d say City just about deserved it. They defended very well and their first goal came after some considerable pressure. It’s never the result that gets me in these encounters but the manner. I hate being defended out of a game - very frustrating. I’d also have to agree with Keano’s frustration, being subbed after a cracking goal and good personal performance. It’s not so much about getting taken off as getting replaced by useless Sergei Bent. To the substitute strikers credit he did score a legitimate goal but that was about all he managed.

The tide had noticeably changed at half time, though, and for me that either puts it down to a damn good team talk by Sven or having Big Bad Tom on the pitch instead of Little Aaron. Was our pace dwarf causing City more problems than anyone had realised? But we trust in Juande, and why not? Hard to tell quite what’s going on in that noggin of his but whatever it is, you can bet your bottom Euro it’s some kind of tactical genius, Gary Kasparov of the game that he is.

The man himself has dealt with Keano’s sub-rage very well. No action is to be taken against our passionate vice-captain who snatched his training jacket from the hands on the bench. Juande said:

“I think it is normal. Players want to play and they are disappointed when they are replaced.”

Fair enough, but the ominous part comes next…

“It is football. We have got a squad and we have people on the bench and we have to share out the minutes between the people available.”

Uh-oh, that sounds like more of Benty Dazzler. Now, God knows, maybe there’s some in the old guy left and just maybe with a bigger share of these minutes he can actually hit a bit of form. Either that, or we’re in for some pretty dour performances, particularly at home were The Bagel expects to see Sergei getting a few starts. I can understand Keano’s frustration, though. If he’s not thinking clearly, he could understand it to mean he’s not as good as Bent, but I doubt many players have that low an opinion of themselves.

In the mean time, another 6,000 keepers are linked with Robbo’s jobbo - Man U’s Ben Foster this time - and yet all the while Fabio Capellio is keeping tabs on our man as a pair of experienced safe hands to guard the gap between the nation’s sticks. Of course Foster could be the next player to really make that jersey his and as much as anything else it would be a pleasure to carry on the chant.

Here lies Walter Fielding. He bought a bagel, and it killed him.

The Bagel.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, March 18th, 2008 at 4:33 am and is filed under Bagel News. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.