Beef Bagel

There’s no two ways about it, it’s just plain weird being a Tottenham fan at the moment. Down at my local on Sunday afternoon with my mate Charlie (a Yiddo through and through) at a-little-too-early o’clock, The Bagel was definitely aware that our team are no push-overs but rather blank on who and what we are and do right now. We don’t quite look like MJ’s team but we don’t really look like anyone else’s either.

We seem to have stopped conceding from set pieces - thank Christ - and once I’m actually convinced of this, who knows, the rivulets of blood at my knuckles from my own dug-in finger nails may finally cease as well. But we’re not exactly rock solid, as demonstrated by the man who is starting to remind me of our last over-priced centre half. Thank you Younes Richards.

We’re still scoring goals, and that was a beautiful hallmark of the Jol era, but the major difference comes in two areas. Firstly, rather than the metronomic Jermain Defoe substitution on the 60 minute mark, we get the sort of tactics I would use on Pro-Evo, short of passing the ball back to Robbo and trying to get him to dribble the entire length of the pitch.

Kaboul can’t be too happy that twice now he’s been subbed and replaced with a makeshift defender. This time it worked out as Didier Zee and Pascal Chimbondabonda in front of England’s true No.1 with Safety First as some sort of uncultured version of Franco Baresi, sweeping up play with the grace of a wrecking ball. Got to hand it to Juande though, it worked. The Irons chucked everything at us in the last five or ten, as would be expected, and despite the pressure and thanks to Robbo’s gloves, I didn’t have to stand there trying to stuff my heart back down my wind pipe while the clock ran down.

It’s hard to tell what plans Ramos has for Kaboul, if any, but if I were a certain French defender I’d be jumping in my X-Wing and flying over to Master Mabbutt’s swamp as fast as R2 will take me. The difference between Dean Richards and Younes Kaboul is that the latter has the ability to play football but the talent he has in serious need of tempering. In his defense though, he wasn’t supposed to be playing week in week out. Come on Ledley just get some adamantium grafted onto you bones and be done with it.

There’s no second chances with Juande; fuck up and your off but he does like to stand up for the little guy though with the majority of each 90 being given to Lennon in every game in charge so far. That never happened under MJ, particularly away from home. In fact, what was nice to see at Upton Park was the way we played. Even if it wasn’t top notch, it was with the same attitude and style with which we do at WHL and that’s something very much associated with the top sides in the league.

The major problem for us right now though is Ramos himself. I’ve no bloody idea what’s going on in that delightfully tanned and continental head of his, most of all because he speaks about as much English as Joe Cole, who has four stock phrases activated at the touch of a button like an old Mr. T doll: “The lads done good”, “The gaffer told me to do it and I did”, “We did it as a team” and “Please can I have another banana.”

The day that we get more than The Radio, Gus Poyet, having his little chat with the BBC cameras is the day that we might start to get a bit of an insight into the vision of the man from Seville. Alan “Curbs” Curbishley, who I’m beginning to hate more and more with each Cockney grammatical error, couldn’t work out what Juande was up to either. Now that’s an interesting sign. He said:

“But they changed it second half. I didn’t quite know what they done when they changed it. I don’t think they did in some respects. It was all signs going out.”

Well, whatever it was it worked and this perhaps is the clear difference between MJ, who many suspected was not the greatest tactician, and a man who understands the chess of the game.

I’m not going to bitch about the penalty decision. If you want all that pub chat crap you can go to another blog but what I did like was Robbie Keane’s interview. Nothing out of the ordinary here but what a nice guy. You just want to take him home.

West Ham didn’t look so bad themselves. Were I a neutral, I’d probably say that the draw was a fair result but I’m not, and it wasn’t. Carlton Cole looked good; a big geezer causing big problems but my greatest pleasure comes from seeing that turncoat-turntwat, Matthew Etherington, is still not anything like as good as he thinks he is. Every time he’s on the ball, the words of a particularly traditional Tottenham cynic, who used to sit behind me, ring through my ears, “Go on then, do your trick.”

Naturally 3 points would have been better than 1 and the Little Yiddo missed out on some much needed in-your-face bragging rights but personally I’m just relieved we didn’t lose to the one team that probably take more pleasure in beating us than anyone else.

As for the moves and shakes of the day there’s two things to note and nota bene. The Sunday Mirror reported on…er…Sunday…that we’re going for a £350m new stadium plan on a site just over the other side of East Stand that’s only going to take two years to build. Sounds good. The only unknown is exactly where we’ll be playing our games in the mean time; Upton Park, Wembley? I’d offer up my back yard if only I had one. Not sure what the capacity would be but I make a far better cup of tea than you can get down the Lane. On lump or two Juande?

The other news is a transfer rumour and yes, miracle upon miracle, it’s not a Spaniard but a Scot. Rangers right-back, Alan Hutton, has been pulling up trees the size of Redwoods for club and country this season and 22-year-old is reported to be on Juande’s Christmas wish list. He’s big and athletic at 6′1″ and 11.5st and doubtless could deputise at centre half should Ramos be looking to teach Kaboul a lesson. Here’s his head…

…trying to find that contact lens with the clumsy help of Drogba.

Hutton’s under contract for four years so he’s not coming cheap if indeed Rangers will let him go and our bid is supposed to be £6m plus either Ricardo Rocha, Paul Stalteri or Tony Gardner moving in the other direction. Personally I’d offer all three if I wasn’t sentimentally attached to Baby Face.

Having put stock in the Sunday Mirror, I’ve just read an address that General Levy made to the EGM at WHL today and when it came to talk of our new stadium he said:

“With our current location, we do not have inherent land values in Tottenham that could drive enabling development and regeneration.”

So, we’re moving away from N17? Is that what he’s saying? Or does he just need to buy more land? God knows. Anyway an announcement, he say, will be made in the next 6 months. Glad that one’s clear then.

Fuzzy-wuzzy was a bagel?

The Bagel.

This entry was posted on Monday, November 26th, 2007 at 4:05 pm and is filed under Bagel News, Match Reports. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.