Beef Bagel

It’s a very strange day. Definitely the long weekend, at least I hope so otherwise I’m in for a bit of a shock tomorrow morning. No, I’ve checked the calendar, it is Easter and yet, there is no Spurs football match today. Spooky. I’ll just have to guzzle more chocolate and watch an extra Bond film this afternoon. Then it’ll feel like a Bank Holiday.

A good few days off before the next fixture is what we all need but I know one man who’s positively foaming at the mouth to play every single day from here til eternity; O Captain my Captain, the man the legend, my one and only love, Mr Ledley King.

Rumour has it that the best tackler in the league will be back to make jaws drop and blood run cold amongst the Sevilla fans and faithful. Let’s face it, he’ll probably score two hatricks with each nipple just to make up for lost time. And it’s not just us lot who are going to be thrilled to have our hero back:

“We’ve missed Ledley’s captaincy but also what he brings as a man and a defender, and having him back will be a big thing for us.”

So says Chris Hughton and here’s the stuff that brings tears to my eyes:

“I can’t speak highly enough of the qualities he will give us.

“The people who have filled in have done a great job but Ledley is our captain and has great respect from everybody and we have missed him.”

He’s right. There’s a whole wall in the Bakery full of chalked up tally marks as I’ve counted the days of Ledley’s absence but my hands are shaking as I mark off these last few days. Amongst all the rumours of career threatening injuries and bone disorders, have we received any sort of explanation as to exactly what has kept him out since Boxing Day? All we’ve every really heard about it on the official website is “King (foot)” and then “King (feet)”. I have some terrible fear that he’ll come on the pitch just to limp off again 30 minutes later, in a way I wanted Joe Cole to do on Saturday. Actually, what I was really hoping for there was that the Cockney forward would break his arms as he soaked up the applause on his first touch of the grass but unfortunately the Fates are not quite as cruel as The Bagel.

Whatever the cause it’s a massive psychological boost for one and all to have King Ledley back. If he can play to form and stay fit it could just be what we need to finish the season in style.

Some more good news, although really it’s just confirmation of what we already knew, is hero number two, Dimitar the Great will most certainly be dressed in Lilywhite next season or at least for the first half of it anyway. His agent, Emile Danchev (good name), said:

“I can categorically say Dimitar will not leave Tottenham this summer to go to Manchester United or any other club - be it Real Madrid, Barcelona or Bayern Munich.

“It’s all speculation and we want it to stop. Dimitar will not go anywhere in this transfer season - and I mean the summer of 2007 - and that is a 100 per cent true statement. I can assure Tottenham and their fans we have no intention of changing our position. Dimitar will definitely be at Spurs next season.”

Sorry, I didn’t quite get that. Are we going to lose Berbatov in the summer?

So he’s guaranteed until January and we’ve from now until then to convince him to stay. Easy peasy really: win the Uefa Cup and finish fourth, we do that kind of thing in our sleep, don’t we?

Another man

who Man U are trying to wrap their greasy tentacles about is the Little Yiddo. This month’s figure of choice is £10m and to looking at the papers, I’m sure they’re just rerunning the identical articles from last year, the year before that and the year that Mr Defoe first approached Mrs Defoe and said: “I’m a love pirate and I’m here for your booty.”

There’s no doubt that Jermain is a quality player but I’ve got to say I’m surprised that the Chewing Gum Machine is interested. He can basically get any player he wants and there are better ones out there. Just watching Obafemi Martins the other day, I mean he plays a similar kind of game to Defoe only…well…better. Why not him?

All the same and I think The Bagel’s said this before, what once seemed such a painful idea is not as tragic as it was. We all love Defoe but we all know there’s more to him than we’re seeing, the worst of it being we already saw it a few seasons ago, so, the question is, where has it gone?

I don’t want to lose him but I’ve feeling that it’s more The Bagel’s sentimental nature than really thinking with my head.

One man, who I’m sure can do plenty with his head is 6′7″ Nikola Zigic (girl’s name) and we’ve sent over a Tottenham scout to take another look at the Serbian colossus tonight as Racing Santander take on our Uefa Cup opponents, Sevilla. Should be a good way to get the measure of the man. Santander are denying all sorts of links:

“No one has spoken to us,” they say, probably in Spanish but then why would we have? We don’t know if we want him yet, hence sending a scout. Keep ‘em peeled tomorrow for news of the game. We’re looking for a hatrick from our man and the entire Seville squad stretchered off.

Last and by no means least is the fascinating transfer news that Damien Comolli has been given a cool £10m to spend purely upon young starlets. I think you get about 5 for that. The first on the list is a mystery Brazilian kid for the first £2m. No one knows his name or where he plays but we are informed that he shall be purchased, snatched up in a rug and bundled into a van, where he shall not see the light of day until he reaches a Belgian feeder club where he will play whilst awaiting a passport. It rather sounds like where taking him as a sex slave. I suppose we may as well maximise the return on our assets.

Not releasing the name of this kid could well be a tactic to stop us being gazumped by another club, particularly if he’s a undiscovered gem or it could just be that this is all utter nonsense. Whatever the case, it’s going to be fun finding out. Enjoy the sunshine.

Yeaster Monday,

The Bagel.

This entry was posted on Monday, April 9th, 2007 at 12:35 pm and is filed under Bagel News, Transfer News. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.